Query letters, junk mail, and what exactly are you going to do with that million dollars from Ed McMahon?

No matter what kind of writer you are, eventually you’ll become a part-time purveyor of the lost art of direct mail. (That’s junk mail to you and me). Because no matter what kind of writer you think you are, at some point you’re going to have to get all dolled up in fishnets and stripper heels and troll the boulevards propositioning literary agents with, “hey baby, you wanna date?” Yep, I’m talking about query letters.

The weird thing is, I do it for a living. Not pimping it on the streets. I work in advertising. (Some would argue it’s a less dignified form of prostitution). I basically write stuff that sells stuff. Be it a commercial, print campaign, or a piece of mail that pops up saying “you might have already won.” It ain’t always purty, but hey, it’s what I do.

So when it comes to query letters, I guess I’m kind of a trained professional.

Or maybe I just have good timing. A few weeks ago I sent out two query packets with partials and three email queries—I contacted a measly five agents. And yesterday I heard back from three of them. Two of the email queries netted requests for partials, and one of my partials got a request for the whole enchilada—the whole manuscript.

I’m realizing that even if The Panama Hotel gets rejected by every agent out there (yeah, I know that’s using passive voice, I’m a laid back guy, it happens), I might still have a lucrative career as a query letter ghostwriter.

At least until Ed McMahon shows up at my door.

Comments

[Adam Hurtubise]

Congrats on all those requests, Jamie. Step 1 in finding an agent is write a great book. You did that. Nice.

Adam

[Jaye Wells]

Fantastic, Jamie. Such good news. Let us know when you get the call.

[m.g. tarquini]

Those are terrific stats for this round of Query Bingorama. You can write my query anytime. In fact, I'm mailing you a check right now.

[Jamie Ford]

So far so good. I'm still holding out hope that I'll hear something from Sandra Dijkstra soon, but honestly I'd be happy with just about anyone.

Speaking of query letters, maybe I'll post mine.

[Daniel Hatadi]

That's a great success rate at such an early stage. Best of luck with it, but I somehow don't think you'll need it.

[Jamie Ford]

Stay tuned. I just got another request for partial, and my first rejection...