Baiting the hook

A few folks have asked about my query letter for The Panama Hotel, so here 'tis. I sent it via snail mail with a partial included, and as a stand-alone email query. I can't emphasize enough the need to boil your story down to one simple sentence. I remember an exercise at Orson Scott Card's Literary Bootcamp where he made us write our entire story/plotline on a 3"x5" card. A great exercise that I still use today. Okay, back to the query...  

 
Dear Ms. Nelson:

I must admit I hate Asian stereotypes. You know the ones. Good at math. Hardworking. We all look alike. Come to think of it, that last one might hold water. After all, my father once wore a button that read “I am Chinese,” while growing up in Seattle’s Chinatown during WWII. It was the only thing that separated him from the Japanese, at least in the eyes of his Caucasian neighbors.

Sad, but true. Which is probably why my novel has a little to do with that particular piece of history.

Anyway, the working title is The Panama Hotel, and when people ask me what the heck it’s all about I usually tell them this:

“It’s the story of the Japanese internment in Seattle, seen through the eyes of a 12-year-old Chinese boy, who is sent to an all-white private school, where he falls in love with a 12-year-old Japanese girl.”

But it’s more complicated than that. It’s a bittersweet tale about racism, commitment and enduring hope––a noble romantic journey set in 1942, and later in 1986 when the belongings of 37 Japanese families were discovered in the basement of a condemned hotel.

This historical fiction novel is based on my Glimmer Train story, I Am Chinese, which was a Top 25 Finalist in their Fall 2006 short-Story Competition For New Writers. An excerpt was also published in the Picolata Review.

Think Amy Tan, but with a sweeter aftertaste.

Thank you for your consideration and time,


Jamie Ford
1909 Mountain View Drive,
Great Falls, MT 59405
(406) 453-9229
jford@iwendt.com
www.jamieford.com


THE PANAMA HOTEL
Historical Fiction
89,000 words / 358 pages

About the author: James “Jamie” Ford grew up near Seattle’s Chinatown and is busy writing his next novel, Rabbit Years. In addition to his Glimmer Train accolades, he took 1st Place in the 2006 Clarity of Night Short Fiction Contest. Jamie is also an alumnus of the Squaw Valley Community of Writers.

He hangs out at www.jamieford.com and has been known to eat jellyfish, sea cucumber and chicken feet on occasion.

(With that in mind, can you boil your book or story down to one sentence? Screenwriters call it a logline. What's yours?) 

My ambassador of kwan

"Show me the, um, well...you know..."After much prayer, fasting, moonlight vigils, reading of entrails, and spins in my sensory-deprivation tank while clutching my Ouija Board, I’ve made one small step for a writer, and one giant leap for my career—by choosing (drumroll please)…Kristin Nelson of the Nelson Agency as my literary agent.

And you know what? I couldn’t be happier! I’ve browsed Kristin’s blog for months (more on that in a moment), I’m familiar with her other authors, and I’ve known that she’s been a very visible up-and-coming agent.

What I didn’t know, was how relentlessly nice she is. That’s the best way to describe her. Professional, wildly passionate about the biz, and a joy to work with.

She also has a solid track record of fiction sales (thank you, Publishers Marketplace), and has expedited the sale of numerous foreign rights, and film rights to Disney. Kristin is someone in the up-cycle of her career, but not so big that I felt lost in the shuffle.

But the competition was tough. I had offers from formidable NYC agents. They were wonderful, talented and kind—and I’m grateful for their offers and sincerely appreciate their time. In the end, all the offering agents “got” my book. And all would be submitting to pretty much the same group of editors. I just felt most comfortable with Kristin.

And you know what? Her blog really helped. It was a nice window into how she worked, even before I queried her. The surprising thing though, was how popular Pubrants is. (Maybe Kristin doesn’t even know.) I tracked web hits, blogrolls and links—and of all the publishing/writer blogs, Kristin’s is second only to that of Miss Snark—and 10x that of the nearest agent. Granted, this is an industry audience and not the book-buying public as a whole, but it was telling. Technology and transparency is changing the industry, and Kristin is right there with it.

So pop by her blog and say hi. Tell ‘em her newest client sent you.

I've made up my mind

My rejection collectionYep, I've settled on a literary agent--I’ll let you know tomorrow.

In the meantime, here are some rejection highlights. Many were of the form-letter variety, but not all. In the end, some very gracious people took time from their busy schedules to read my stuff and respond, and it’s sincerely appreciated. Thank you.

“Thanks for sending me The Panama Hotel, which I read last night -- I enjoyed the book, it was well written and the characters were fabulous, but it just didn't zing with me the way I had hoped. Usually I'd recommend some revisions, but considering that you already have a few offers on the table, I'll step aside. If it doesn't work out with the agent of your choosing, I hope you'll contact me - as there is so much to like here and I'd love to see what else you could come up with.  Or (and I see this as the more likely option), drop me a line when it hit bookshelves and I'll pick myself up a copy.”

“I'm sorry to say that I can't offer you representation at this time.  If you choose not to sign with one of the other agents you're currently speaking with, I'd be happy to give you some feedback.  If you then undertook a revision along the lines I'd suggest, I'd be happy to reconsider the project.”

“Thanks for the opportunity to consider THE PANAMA HOTEL. Your characters and setting are truly fantastic, but ultimately I'm not enthusiastic enough about the story to offer representation.”

“Thank you for sending me the first few pages of your manuscript. The Panama Hotel has an interesting premise and some lovely writing, but in the end, I just don't think I'm the right agent for your manuscript. I want to encourage you to continue sending it out to other agents and editors. I'm sure you will find a home for your book.”

“I read this right away and I’m afraid wasn’t captured by the writing, although I do think the premise is fantastic.  Very best of luck to you and thanks so much for keeping me posted.”

“Thanks so much for giving me the opportunity to consider your manuscript, much of which I read last night. You are clearly a talented writer and I can understand why you have interest from agents. Unfortunately, however, I am being extremely careful about taking on new projects, particularly first novels which are very difficult to place in the current marketplace. I fear I didn't feel quite as enthusiastically about this book as I hoped to, and so won't be offering representation. Clearly this is a business of taste and sensibilities and I look forward to hearing of the sale on Publishers Marketplace.”

Patience is a !@#$% virtue

"Have you decided yet, hon?"I’m still waiting. Why? Because I said I would. When agents asked for the full, almost all asked that I not make a decision until I heard back. They promised to read it quick, and I, like the French Lieutenant’s Woman, promised to wait (a few days). Except instead of standing on a seawall, I’m staring at my cell phone looking for the caller ID to flash (212). Ring! (Checking the battery, again).

So what am I doing to kill the restless hours?  Here’s a glimpse:

Talking to authors
Interested agents have given me names of clients to talk to. Have they smiled and said good things while blinking “run you fool, run!” in Morse code? Nah, all had huggy, squishy, loverly things to say. But it’s more than the happy salad days. I’ve learned a lot by hearing about books that flopped, difficult sales and other bumps in the road, and how they handled them.

Searching Publishers Marketplace
If you’re querying, it’s well worth the $20/month to join. Not only can you find out who reps whom, but you can seriously look under the hood of an agent's career. Book sales, relative size of deals, foreign rights, film rights—all of it’s right there at your fingertips. (Granted, some agents don’t report their deals—why is that?)

Haunting writers' forums
I joined Backspace and Absolutewrite, where I've scoured the sites for postings about the agents that offered representation and the other agents that have the full manuscript. The good, the bad, the voluminous rejections...

Casing Barnes & Noble
I made a list of books sold by the agents I’m talking to. Then I hit the bookstore and looked up the acknowledgement pages of said books. Some agents got glowing mentions. Others were conspicuously absent. Does it mean a lot?  I dunno, but every little bit helps.

The Coconut Telegraph
I emailed a few writer friends asking,“whatdoyouthink?” All had varying opinions of the agents, but pretty much the same advice—take your time and choose who’s right for you. Easier said than done.

Meanwhile, I’m still waiting.

(Speaking of waiting, here's a nice blog entry by Kristin Nelson about exactly that).